The early recovery stage after addiction can be difficult to navigate, and there are a number of things to consider and relearn once you finish rehab treatment or have just managed to go sober.
A common concern for people in the early stages of recovery is whether it is a good idea to date during this stage. Find out more about dating in early recovery and read our advice here.
Risks of Dating in Early Recovery
Forming a new relationship whilst in the earliest stages of addiction recovery can be helpful for some people who may feel positively influenced, but there are also a number of risks. Some of the main risks when dating someone new in the first few months of sobriety include:
Relapse Triggers
Dating can cause an increase in stress, trigger emotional highs and lows, as well as result in conflicts which have the potential to trigger cravings or relapse. In some cases, starting a relationship shortly into the recovery period can be triggering and make sobriety harder than those who concentrate on their own well-being.
Many classic first or early-date activities also commonly involve alcohol, such as pubs, bars, restaurants, and shows, which can be triggering for some people in the earliest stages of recovery.
Distraction from Recovery
Focusing on a new romantic relationship might divert attention and energy away from crucial aspects of recovery such as therapy, support groups, and self-care. Relationships require a lot of attention and can often feel consuming in the early stages, so this can have a negative impact on self-care and work.
Losing focus on your own recovery can be risky, especially during the initial stages of sobriety as relapse is most common during this period.
Developing Co-dependency
In early recovery, individuals may be vulnerable to forming codependent relationships where they excessively rely on their partner for emotional support and guidance.
Relying on another person can hinder a person’s personal growth and independence and can also result in an unhealthy relationship that is one-sided or intense. Codependent relationships are often very intense and can result in relapse if the relationship ends, which is something to bear in mind if you notice signs of co-dependency.
Unhealthy Patterns
If a relationship dynamic mirrors past unhealthy patterns such as enabling behaviours, it can risk a person’s progress in recovery. This is especially the case if a new partner regularly consumes drugs or alcohol, as this can make it much more difficult to remain sober and on track with the recovery journey.
Can Dating in Early Recovery Be Beneficial?
Whilst there are a number of risks of dating in early recovery, it can also be very beneficial for some people if the relationship is healthy and you remain focused on yourself.
For some people, a new relationship can have a positive effect on the recovery journey during the initial stages, particularly if the other person is also sober.
Having somebody close to keep you accountable can be a great motivator, and if you show risks of relapse, they may be able to support you and avoid a potential drug or alcohol relapse before it occurs.
Another benefit of dating when in the initial stages of recovery is the impact that a new relationship can have on a person’s general well-being. Mental health may be low when adjusting to life sober, and having a source of happiness and somebody to share new experiences with can be very beneficial.
How to Manage Your Sobriety While Dating
Managing sobriety while dating can be difficult, so it is important to pay attention and remain committed to maintaining your recovery journey.
Here are some strategies to help manage your sobriety while dating:
Prioritise Your Sobriety – Make your sobriety the top priority in your life and be clear with yourself and your partner that maintaining sobriety is incredibly important.
Choose the Right Partner – Select a partner who supports your recovery journey and respects your boundaries. A partner who understands addiction and enjoys participating in activities that don’t involve alcohol or drugs is best to help you remain sober.
Communicate Openly – Be honest and upfront about your addiction history and your recovery journey to help your partner understand you and your sobriety. Open communication will help you to build trust and allow both partners to understand each other’s needs and concerns.
Plan Sober Dates – Plan activities and dates that are not centred around alcohol or drugs. Explore sober-friendly dates such as coffee shops, museums, parks, or outdoor activities like hiking or biking.
Surround Yourself with Support – It is really beneficial to maintain your connections with friends, family, or support groups who understand and support your sobriety. Lean on them for guidance, encouragement, and accountability alongside your partner.
You should also continue to attend support group meetings, therapy sessions, or other recovery-related activities regularly to keep you on track.
Set Boundaries – Establish clear boundaries to protect your sobriety with your partner. This might include avoiding triggering situations or people, limiting time spent in triggering environments such as pubs or bars, and knowing when to leave if you feel uncomfortable.
Be Mindful of Relapse Triggers – Identify and avoid situations, people, or emotions that might trigger cravings or pose a risk to your sobriety. Developing coping strategies to manage stress, anxiety, or other triggers effectively is the best way to maintain long term sobriety.
Support During the Recovery Journey
If you find yourself struggling with cravings and urges or are concerned about drug or alcohol relapse, don’t hesitate to reach out for help. Speak to a therapist, counsellor, or sponsor who can offer guidance and support and get you back on track.
If you do not feel stable within yourself or in recovery, it may not be the right time to start a new relationship. Focusing on yourself and your sobriety should be the most important thing once you have left rehab or finished detox.
However, if you have met a person who is a good influence and understanding, you may feel more supported than ever. Reach out to our team if you want to talk about the recovery journey or think you need help today.
Posted on Friday, April 5th, 2024 at 10:54 am in Latest News, Rehab.
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